I got today's baskets delivered a bit earlier than usual today.
Tomorrow is Christmas, and I have a few presents to wrap and a furry house to clean up courtesy of my large four legged family.
My children are growing up and my parents are both gone, so Christmas for me and many my age is different than it was.
I would love to go to church tonight, but doubt that will be possible. The last time I went on Christmas eve was five years ago, with my mom. She struggled to walk, her body full of cancer. But as the hymns started up, she sang. It was her last Christmas. She knew it, as did we.
My daughters have told me if I can do it, they'll go to church with me. I would become a teary mess , but it would be so good for my soul.
It likely won't be this year though. As I drove home from delivering the veggies, "Silent Night" played on the radio, and my tears flowed freely. Not a good sign that I will handle a one hour service well at all.
As I get older, I understand the gifts my parents gave me in my childhood, and I know that's why I am so emotional right now.
Christmas is a family time and this seems to be the case regardless of your beliefs. A giving time and a happy time for some. But also a time of great sadness.
It is a time to miss and remember those who are not with you anymore. A time to think of the simplicity of being a carefree child at Christmas as magic unfolded around you, and miss those times.
A time to enjoy your children as they marvel at the magic of Christmas.
It's a time when you stop and realize that many of the mistakes you have made in life are catching up with you. A time of reflection.
A time of gratitude for some, a time of loneliness for others.
So the best I can wish for you is peace.
( Mother Theresa)
Merry Christmas everyone.